Wednesday, January 3, 2007

Coffee blech.

I measured it out. Seattle's Best, 3 tablespoons to 3 6 oz. measurements of water. THAT'S WHAT THE PACKAGE SAID, I SWEAR.

WHY oh WHY does my coffee (if I make it at home) always have the strength of motor oil? WHY?

Why can't I have a decent cuppa at home? Dunkin' Donuts is permanently Out with me, after (last Saturday - Saturday before last?) my fiance went to grab a coffee for me, brought it back, and, upon taking the first sip, I realized I have never in my life had something so vile inside my mouth. NEVER. No, not even THAT was this vile. They must've used rotten coffee with rat turds, and sweetened it with rancid yeti urine, then topped it off with VERY-long expired milk. It was disgusting. Dunkin' Donuts, you're dead to me now, nevermind that I have about $20 in dunkin donuts gift certificates.

And Starbucks? I can't do their regular drip coffee. It tastes like cigarette ashes. The coffee shop at work? I can only stomach their flavored coffees. WHY has the coffee world brought me to this point, WHY?

So now I sit here, sipping the remnants of my motor oil, and reminiscing about the days of old. Just like a Duke.

If anybody has coffee tips, please share them. :(


Nonny said...

I've had similar experiences with Dunkin's. One should not be able to viscerally taste the oil in coffee. *wrinkles nose*

I like Starbucks, but I can't drink their drip coffee, either. Part of the problem is that they only supply these flimsy little pieces of plastic or wood to stir your coffee. You really need a spoon to get the sugar mixed in properly.

With Starbucks, I'd actually recommend a latte. The espresso is stronger, but the milk cuts down on the bitterness. If you want a bit of sweet, but not as much as their usual flavored drinks, ask for a toffee nut latte. They had it as a seasonal promotion several years ago (as in, back when I was living in WA) and will still make it on request.

For home, um. Half pot of water and about a quarter inch of coffee grounds should result in coffee with the consistency of tea. My ex-gf hated strong coffee, too. If it's too weak, then stick the coffee back in the reservoir and put it through a second time. :)

Emily Ryan-Davis said...

I don't like weak coffee, but I suppose my coffee taste buds aren't attuned to the new American Standard of loving all the Sumatra and Guatemala and Kenya and Jamaican and etc. blends. I love going into a diner, or a Bob Evans (of all places) and getting a cup of coffee. It's plain ol' coffee, not the fanciest coffee in the world but strong enough to actually have some substance to it. It's good coffee for washing down a pile of whole grain pancakes. :)

Starbucks (and just about everywhere but Dunkin Donuts) I buy lattes. Even the iced americana at Starbucks is too strong and bitter, these days; I used to love that one. Unfortunately, a latte every morning adds up $$-wise. I can spend $15/week on coffee if I only buy one small latte every day of work.

I'll try the half pot/quarter inch suggestion, though! Thanks for the tip.

Ansley Vaughan said...

Emily, I'm ashamed to say I've had so many bad experiences that I now prefer instant. The one exception, when I make it myself, is Jamaican Blue Mountain, which is a fabulous coffee, but also horrendously expensive.
At work, in our building in London, we have a little Fairtrade stand -- do you have that in the States -- and they make the best latte I've tasted. Lovely biscotti too, which is not good...

Miranda Heart said...

I can't say what is best for everyone but here is what I have found is best for me. First off, I use Community coffee, new hotel blend. I believe I use medium roast. THEN I do one scoop, aprox 1 T of coffee grounds to two cups of water. Whatever the package directions I do half. This coupled with my sweet n low and milk or cream has made me the most unbelievably awesome coffee I've ever tasted. My husband thinks it tastes like water. LOL But, my mother in law, two bestest friends and I love it.
And I never ever let the coffee sit in the coffee maker. As soon as it is done brewing I put it in my ceramic tea pot. it stays hot for a long time and doesn't burn from sitting on the hot plate.
Good luck!